Dear Sir,

I wish to register a complaint, and I was wondering if you might be so kind as to forward it to the correct authorities so that I might glean some sort of response.

My concerns are to do with a certain industry within the village. An industry of which myself and my colleagues are an integral part. To wit - The Crime Industry.

You see my organisation - The SPTG (Sedgefield Petty Thieves' Guild) - has been a major role-player in this local industry for a number of years and, we like to believe, has become quite successful in its own right. As chairperson of the organisation I can proudly point out that since our inception in 2001, the SPTG has become synonymous with all aspects of petty crime in the village (and indeed its surrounds). In fact one might say that we have become the household name for crime in Sedgefield.

Furthermore, we are of the educated opinion that our little group has put the village ‘on the map’ as it were, in the popular underworld of criminal activity.

There’s no doubt that the efforts of our committee and members have not gone unnoticed by the hierarchy of SAPTA (South African Petty Theft Association):- The fact that we have won numerous prestigious national awards pays tribute to this. These include the coveted "Best Grab Through Window" (Cell phone category)for 2003, the "Most Garden Implements Illegally Acquired in a single month" for 2005 and 2006, the "Holiday Home Liquor Lift" for which one of our members broke the record in January 2009, and of course the team event - the "Builder's Site Midnight Raid" of 2011 which culminated in the beautiful renovations of our clubhouse (address withheld).

To date our members have proudly upheld our self sufficiency motto "We Help Ourselves" with a clean record of no personal injury to any of our customers and/or suppliers, and minimal damage to any property. (One exception - the much spoken about 'Bent burglar bars' incident of 2010 - is still under investigation by SAPTA - we still firmly believe that this was not one of our members, but a renegade student uneducated in the finer arts of homestead window 'fishing').

What should also be noted is our ‘clean audit’ record from 2005 until the current year – which in a nutshell means that our ‘Incarceration Average’ (or for the man on the street, ‘time spent behind bars’) has been kept well below the set level of three months per annum per 20 members. Obviously this level could only be possible with an impressive escape from arrest average, of which we are rather proud.

But of course the reason for this letter is not to shower our Petty Thieves Guild with praise – but to protect or members’ livelihood.

Why? Because it seems times are changing for the worse, and the quiet ‘below the radar’ way of life for our hardworking, quick-fingered and peace-loving members is being threatened. It has come to our notice that other, much larger crime franchises - some of them nationally based, are being allowed to move into this area, without any public participation process being entered into!

This begs the question:- Is local industry being looked after? With takings already being more than a little tight, why are more players being permitted to further minimise the already meagre living our members are managing to steal?

We do understand that competition is healthy, but can our small community support this influx? We have already seen several members of the HSF (Handbag Snatching Forum) working the Sedgefield streets - this when that association's constitution clearly states that members may NOT operate in areas of population less than 20 000.

Furthermore, we have it on good authority that the directors of the board of the Port Elizabeth VS&G (Vehicular Smash and Grab) franchise has already sanctioned an advance party to begin proceedings for the setting up of a Garden Route Branch in Sedgefield:- This when the village does not even fall within the Eastern Cape catchment area!

Once again we understand that it is a free world, and many might say that it is time that Sedgefield caught up with the rest of South Africa so that its residents may enjoy all the criminal options available elsewhere in the country, but at what cost to our tiny local theft industry? Is the small, independent petty thief soon to be extinct, shut down by bigger, heartless corporate machines that steal only for profit rather than to support a family?

It goes without saying that our local members spend almost all of their hard-stolen earnings right here in Sedgefield - locals supporting locals one might say? Surely it is obvious that the larger franchises will simply suck the village dry.

Where will it end? We believe that once one or two of the national crime franchises are allowed a foot in the door (or an arm through the security gate) there will be no stopping the influx. Next the CHU (Car Hijackers Union) will be granted full access to our intersections, and Muggers-r-Us will be winning tenders for operating around all of our ATMs and, Heaven forbid, OUR MARKETS!

And we all know that once they are in, it won’t be long before the League of Murderers will be vying for street frontage.

Please realise that we are not asking for a ‘police state’ or anything like that – simply a little more control by the authorities as to the numbers of crime-industry players allowed to set up trade (for want of a better word), and prudence in what sort of criminal elements are synonymous with the quiet, laid back character of the Garden Route that we petty thieves have come to know and love.

For example after well-attended bilateral talks with the gentlemen of SAFU (South African Flashers Union) SPTG already has an agreement in place with that group, granting them limited access to certain points in the Village, and only over high season periods.

Likewise members of the NWCCS (National White Collar Crime Syndicate) have agreed in writing that though their members are allowed to visit Sedgefield to do normal fishing, they may NOT extract funds, or indeed bank details, from any locals by electronic means.

But whilst these two groups are, in our educated view, low-impact players in the crime industry, if we do not put a stop to the influx and overtrading of high-impact criminal associations such as described earlier in this letter, there is no saying where our industry will be in a few years time. What next? Will we be opening our village to members of parliament?

Please will those in authority put a stop to this unchecked influx!

Kind regards
B Webb